i have been going through something the last week or so. Not sure what i should do. i feel so unfullfilled. i NEED to serve Mistress. Not being able to is just killing me. When She gave me a couple of writing tasks. i felt so happy while i was doing them and after i finished. But, i really need to take care of Her. The thought of being there welcoming Her home from class with dinner on the table and the whole house clean sound amazing, fantastic, wonderful, and happy.
How do i deal with the emotions of not being able to serve Mistress? i never thought i would become this way. i have always been the type of person who says, "i do not need anyone. i can take care of myself. i am woman. Hear me roar." Now? i am still a strong woman, but the thing i desire most is to serve the One i love with every fiber of my being.
i think i need to talk to Mistress about doing more tasks for Her. i hope She agrees that that would be a good option.
Who would have thought i would become this type of person? :) i am so happy now that Mistress has opened my eyes to what i have always been underneath all the "i do not need anyone" facade. i just can not get over how lucky i am to have found the One my heart has ached for. How did i become so mushy? Good thing Mistress does not mind! He-he :D
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